Application Madness

I’m writing this from an app on my phone. I’m digging this new fancy phone stuff. The future is here!

How are you?

New Phone!

I finally got a new phone: HTC Eris. I’ve wasted the night playing around with it. Updates later.

Worries and Hopes

At the very moment I might be considered a little tipsy. This is because these days my best forms of entertainment are my trips to a bar. It is just about the most human interaction/entertainment I have these days. This is probably a bit of a problem. I don’t exactly see it as a good thing.

This is one of the reasons I count the days until I’m back in the familiar places. I need a reconnection because I’ve felt lost and directionless lately. I feel like a mess.

To echo the title of this post, I’m hoping that things will turn out much better for me in the near future. I’m worried about the chance that things completely feel failed again.

I have too many problesm and shortcomings I cannot admit to any one. How weird is that?

Tipsy

Two downtrodden posts in a row? Ugh. Things must be falling apart quickly.

I’m currently tipsy and unable to really concentrate on posting. Unfortunately, as my life has gone these days, drinking beer has been just about my only form of entertainment. Sigh.

I am hoping for a change though. I’m waiting for an email to come in from the school I applied to. I can’t wait to start my new chapter of life.

I feel so pathetic. Nothing feels right anymore. At least I can still type. Useless rewards.

I fail to give a damn anymore about most everything. Could there be something so damning?

I thought this was supposed to be a release. Ugh. I fail, but still follow. Boo me.

A Day of Nothing

My days at work lately have become exercises in keeping my sanity. I spent today half looking for some sort of motivation, failing, then deciding that I’ll just get to the job folders on my desk tomorrow. After that I just noodled in my journal about how lousy of a day I was having.

Sigh.

About the only thing remotely productive I did today was help a coworker with their woes in Microsoft Excel. That didn’t take too much effort though. It was mostly reminding him to actually understand the formulas before he comes bothering me. It really didn’t take much effort, as you might imagine.

Double Sigh.

I need a lengthy break from work. I know that I’m already counting the days until Thanksgiving. I suppose I’m also counting down until next year, when I will endeavor to finally get out from under this job that has ran its course and long ago sank in the gloaming depths of apathy and loathing.

So close, so nervous, so unsure of my daring.

WriMoAsplode

This year I attempted to get back into NaNoWriMo after an absence of two or three years. Let’s call it a casual testing of the waters. It ended up being a mixed bag, but mostly positive, as I will explain.

After about ten pages, I had completed no more than three rapid changes in the plot. This, compounded with the my continuing battle with being too damn busy, led me to not continue this year. I decided that mindlessly writing 50,000 words wasn’t in the cards.

The upside, however, is that I don’t see this as a spectacular failure. I actually found my ten pages quite informational. Though the little bit I wrote wasn’t too exciting, I believe that there were some really good ideas in there. I just need more time/experience to flesh them out properly. I am again confident of my ability to write something more substantial, descriptive and exciting, no matter how long or short that would be.

In the end I think the most negative thought I had was a lament that I should have somehow had more robots. I’ll categorize that as not too bad.

Blah Day

I had another post written for today, but I don’t feel like transcribing it. I just had a very blah sort of day. I blame the weather. Why is it toasty and pretty much in the 80s yesterday and overcast and rainy all day today? Stupid weather. Anyway, the day sort of just wandered by and I feel really unproductive.

Scribble Scrabble

Normally, in continuing with the methods that have brought with me an increased ability to write blog posts, I would hash one out on paper before hand. However, after writing a long letter, I have neither the time nor desire to buckle down and come up with something right now. I will keep this short and sweet.

I am thinking about sending out Christmas cards this year. The problem is that I have one address in my address book. Damn you advent of technology?

With my new commitment to writing, I considered NaNoWriMo this year. I just don’t have the time though. Maybe next year?

I got a large splotch of ink on my hand today, and I’m not quite sure how I did that. Fountain pen baby steps.

I plan to spend this weekend sleeping as much as possible.

Lost in Limbo

I cannot explain how many times I go to work and roll my eyes at my coworkers. A favorite activity of many in the office is the fine art of smack talk and insults. I do not participate because a) it’s pointless and b) they are really quite juvenile about it. The fraternity was a few years ago, guys.

My current boss hates my old boss, even though he’s never met him. Sure, my old boss might be flawed, but it’s really childish to keep berating someone you don’t even know. This is especially true if your rants are easily countered by simple logic. You get a big eye roll, new boss of mine.

I’m working towards escaping and doing something different, which is specifically a career change. I’m trying to accept that I will be in limbo for some time. The consolation is that things could be a lot better on the other side. I suck at not having concrete plans with known results though. It frightens and paralyzes me. I also find myself confronted by many news articles telling me how the economy sucks, and how nobody graduating is getting a jobs. I recall that I took this job three years ago in a fit of desperation. I worry that this plan will work out no better, leaving me more astray. I’m scared, stressed, and lost.

There is this particular brand of bottled tea called Honest Tea that I like to drink from time to time. They place inspirational quotes on the inside of the their lids. Here is the quote that was on the the lid of the bottle I drank this evening:

“To dare is to lose one’s footing momentarily. Not to dare is to lose oneself.” — Søren Kierkegaard

Honest Tea?

Fruity Solidarity

To whom it may concern:

It has been quite a few years since I’ve had braces. I hear that you are getting them soon, and I would like to tell you my story.

My parents acquiesced to getting me braces in middle school (seventh/eighth grad). I recall being leery about it, but I was also excited about the prospect of straight teeth. What is strange is that I don’t remember what my teeth were like before braces. I think they were mostly crooked and shifted oddly, as well as being a bit of an overbite. To correct my teeth, I was to have braces for two years.

I remember bits and pieces of my initial procedure. My family was referred to this particular orthodontist by our long time family dentist. At the time I had a problem involuntarily gagging while dentistry work was being done in my mouth. I relayed this problem to the technicians who started my braces procedure. They told me to concentrate on the paper mache balloon hanging from the ceiling in the distance. It worked miraculously. To this day, it is still a trick I use from time to time at the dentist.

Anyway, here are several other things I remember:
– The substance that was used to make a mold of my teeth had this very particular flavor to it. I now somehow both remember it and cannot immediately recall what that taste was like.
– I remember picking out the color of the bands around my braces. I believe I picked blue, which was a color I used most of my two years in braces.
– There was a bar placed that ran across the roof of my mouth. I remember running my tongue over it and thinking about how foreign it felt.
–One of the technicians was rather attractive, especially to my seventh grade self. *cough*

Every month afterward I would go back to the orthodontist’s office for checkups and replacements on the band running through my braces. The band would get smaller and smaller every time, and it would make my teeth very sore. To help alleviate this I was given a piece of plastic to chew on and try to work the stress out of my gums. Thinking about it in retrospect, I probably should have just used some baby teething toy from Wal-Mart. ;)

I also followed all the warnings and protections for maintaining my braces, which included using a Water Pik in lieu of flossing and saying no to popcorn, gum, and hard food and candies. I so followed this cold turkey that it was years before I would even consider getting any of those food items.

After two years, I got my braces off. I was given plastic retainers to wear at night to keep my teeth inline. I believe I wore them every night for at least a year, if not more. It was a small price to pay to make sure my two years of a metal mouth were not in vain.

The results were well worth the effort. I now have well-aligned teeth, which is definitely a point of vanity I can hang my hat on. Brushing my teeth is a lot easier now that my teeth are lined up correctly. My jaw also rests nicely together when I close my mouth, resulting in less stress.

Ultimately, it was well worth the discomfort to get excellent teeth. I hope you will feel the same way. I think it is a very worthy and excellent investment.

Regards and pearly whites,
NegativeForty